Understanding Our Own Family And How It Impacts Us As Therapists
Understanding
A mental grasp : COMPREHENSION
The power of comprehending. especially : the capacity to apprehend general relations of particulars
The power to make experience intelligible by applying concepts and categories
A mutual agreement not formally entered into but in some degree binding on each side
—
Family
We all come from families of some sort, whether biological or adopted.
We are also informed by our culture and larger society.
This can include, but is not limited to: class, gender, race, ethnicity, migration, sexuality, ability status, faith, religion, and more.
Understanding the families and culture we come from gives us understanding and insight into why we are the we are, in particular our personal boundaries.
Perhaps our family members and/or caregivers abused, harmed, and/or neglected us.
Boundaries are the limits and rules we set for ourselves within relationships.
A person with healthy boundaries can say “no” to others when they want to, but they are also comfortable opening themselves up to intimacy and close relationships.
Read more here.
Questions To Ask Yourself
What do you think your role as a therapist is?
What do you think the client’s role in therapy is?
How do you negotiate disagreements and repair conflicts with clients?
Do you wait for the client to bring up issues?
Do you bring them up first?
What’s your relationship when conflicts and disagreements occur in the therapist-client relationship?
What type of clients tend to be drawn to you a therapist?
What types of concerns and issues?
What type of personality and temperament?
What sort of age range?
How are problems and disagreements addressed in your family? Are they?
Who usually brings up problems first?
Who is the most outwardly stressed person in your family?
Who is the most inwardly stressed person?
Is there a mediator in your family?
What role do you inhabit in your family?
What would happen if you stopped or engaged less in your family role?
How is love and care shown in your family?
Do you feel able to ask for help from your family members?
Are there topics in your family that are not discussed openly?
How are differences handled in your family? This could be differences in beliefs, religion, faith, sexuality, gender, and so forth.
What You Can Do
Learn about your own family system (roles, rituals, beliefs, patterns, norms)
Practice curiosity around how your family and culture of origin shapes your work as a therapist
Resources